Tuesday, 31 January 2012

Some Kind Of An Announcement

Juice Nothing On Hiatus
I greet you: Hello.

Wow, it’s been a long time since I’ve updated this news section - about two and a half a months to be specific. Now, I am sure (generally speaking) most people would account any lack of work to an excess of laziness. And (generally speaking), most people would be right. But to anyone who has frequented this site recently (and God bless you, really) you will know that quite the opposite is the truth.

For this reason (and for more detailed versions of this reason, which I will go into shortly) I will not be wasting any time with attempts of making this post humorous, worthwhile of your time, or anything besides just a plain old boring informative bunch of words, telling you nothing more than what I have been up to lately. So get ready for the most below average ride of your life, and feast your eyes on whatever it is I am about to type.

Since the last time I updated this news section, I have essentially launched SIX FUCKING BLOGS. Read that again if you like. People wonder why I am so goddamn moody - it’s because my entire Christmas holiday was spent sitting where I am right now: my room, in front of the computer which is slowly fusing my contact lenses to my cornea. And it’s not even like these were some small “throw-away” blogs either - these were really fucking big! Possibly the biggest I’ve ever written.

In case you missed them, the blogs were Dear 2011 (my ode to the year that already feels miles away) and The Top 50 Albums Of 2011, Reinterpreted As Short Stories (Parts 1 - 5). Let me be the first to say this: I went too far. I hate myself for it. And I am burnt out beyond any of you could probably imagine. I have written more words in this short time than most people write in 10 years, I am sure of it.

What’s even worse is that I have another one about 95% written; another one about 60% written; my best short story yet about 50% written; and five other really good ideas partially written (not to mention an entire in-depth guide for the Top 50 Albums blog half way through). Upon which realising, I had to turn to myself and say “By God, Jared. STOP.” Because if I don’t, I will surely die.

So that’s what was so !important; tah-dah. I announce my indefinite hiatus from Juice Nothing right here, right neow. This is not to say one or two blogs might not slip in over the next few months, but it is to say that I am not pressuring myself or even allowing the thoughts to enter my mind. It will have to happen stress-free and na-tu-ra-lly. And my main reason is this:

I have said this before, and here I go again: by far the most important thing to me right now is the EP I have been working on since the end of 2008. A few months ago I announced the release date as February 2012. Surprise, surprise - no. What I will tell you is that all the vocals are recorded, some final mixes are going down, and mastering is being discussed. What I won’t tell you is that there are still some major problems. It’s killing me, I am completely over it (notice a running theme here?), and a part of me wants to scrap the whole fucking thing.

However, I won’t, because I have aged much faster due to the stress, and I’d hate for that to go to waste. Instead, I am pushing back the release date to 05 April 2012. I feel I can make this in good time, and it is also the day Kurt Cobain died, so viva la symbology.

In summary: fuck Juice Nothing, and fuck you. I need full focus on this or it will never happen, because it hasn’t happened, and I have worked fucking hard.

That said, one thing that will definitely be out before Coming Down Happy is Nitrous Of The Living Dead 2: HELLium On Earth. The last version I saw was a bit over a week ago, and it was all that and a bag of decent crisps. It makes the first one look like that Lily Allen shit. No idea exactly when this will bless your interwebz, but it’s soon. Ash and Ammr are slaving away and it is truly a last remaining happy creative in my life.

So yeah, that’s all I have to say. As promised: nothing humorous or really worthwhile. I guess if you love me or something, you could always follow me on Twitter, because that’s where the magic happens, and is a good place to check if I gone and done something.

I love you all and will miss you so, but will be back with a vengeance and a hard-on, believe you me you me you.

I bid you farewell: Goodbye.

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